Completely Unnecessary

I just watched this week’s LOST on ABC’s website. While it’s no Hulu (love!), it is nice to be able to watch them online.

ABC has prominent commercials - most of which are ABC-based - but I’m not sure that their outside advertisers are getting their money’s worth.

***Spoilers***

The most recent episode is entitled “This Place Is Death”. Perhaps not that auspicious for advertisers from the outset, but it is really all in the timing.

The lead out for the Act II commercial break saw an ashen and profusely-bleeding Charlotte plead with Jin not to let Sun come back to the island. They go to commercial on the obviously sick woman wildly screaming, “THIS PLACE IS DEATH!”

The commercial run directly after?

Tourism Hawaii.

Because why not? Why not run an ad for the real-life location of LOST’s death island?

I mean, I don’t think an ad for an island you have to fly to is a good fit for the show in general, though I understand Hawaii’s desire to capitalize on the beauty of the locations shown week after week.

But perhaps the Act II break would have been better spent viewing that grating Desperate Housewives primer again.

I will note, however, my satisfaction in seeing three weeks’ worth of promises regarding Charlotte finally come to fruition. Amen.

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So, I wasn’t going to watch this, but I figured what the hell. It is too freaking cold to go anywhere or to live.

Wow, he’s citing Afghanistan as a success story. Oh, and followed by Iraq, so great!

Bush acknowledged that there is ‘legitimate debate’ about some of the decisions he’s made, but ‘there can be little debate about the results.’ Um, I disagree with both that assessment and nearly everything he’s done.

He just can’t stop the smirk. I think it’s his nervous tic. (But, oh the rage it inspires.)

He also think he’s ‘expand[ed] opportunity and hope here at home.’ It appears he means NCLB and Medicare .

‘Vulnerable human life is better protected’ and America’s air and water are cleaner. I know he genuinely believes that first one, but it takes some serious gumption to look straight in the camera and say his environmental policy has been beneficial to the environment in any way.

But, oooh, oooh! This is the last time we’re going to see him as our president!

I remember thinking in 2004 that we wouldn’t get through these four years, but somehow we did. Not unscathed, but there are only 4.5 more days of this nonsense. And I get to spend the last two of them on vaycay.

I’m just glad he didn’t preempt The Office or 30 Rock. When I saw he was speaking at 8 I was incensed, but the existence of central time means he didn’t ruin absolutely everything he touches.

I mean, I’ll probably just watch them on Hulu anyway, but it’s the thought that counts.

And this is what I chose to blog about today. I dedicate it to the happy thought of Citizen Bush.

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I was door-knocking for Jeremy Karpen today. Everything was going swimmingly, chatting with residents and taping pamphlets to their doors. I marched up and down numerous flights of steps.

I talked to two guys who, whilst not speaking amazing English, were receptive and friendly. Walking northbound, I headed up another tall stairway - the bonus of houses with garden apartments that aren’t actually basement apartments. No one home.

Climbing the steps and the next house north, I knocked and waited. I looked around aimlessly as I waited. Mounted to the left of the door was a small, closed-circuit video camera. But it wasn’t pointed at the porch - it was pointed at the street.

Now, Season Three of The Wire tells me that houses with cameras pointed at the street are most likely a stash house. There’s no reason to tape the street unless you want to know who’s coming well in advance. Images of men I didn’t want to meet chunked through my brain.

I taped my flyer to the screen door and bolted. The odds of Stringer answering the door seemed low.

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Apparently John McCain has pulled out of Michigan - stopping both his TV and direct mail campaigns.

Michigan is still in the toss-up category on a lot of electoral sites, but I guess McCain’s internals show it a bit differently. 17 electoral votes is a lot concede with a month until the election. The morale inside the McCain camp must be terrible.

I’ve been playing with different scenarios that put Michigan in the red column, so it’s nice to know I don’t have to do that anymore.

No debate liveblog today - probably. (Dry your eyes). I’m out to the burbs for some pay tv action - no staid, informative SBS debate wrap up for me! No sir, I’m watching Wolf in all his glory. My debate day will have Beard!

To occupy yourself in the absence of my nonsense - try Palin Bingo.

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Did that work? My puns are more and more belabored these days. You can blame The Wire (and Violeta, the addict who got me hooked), which has eaten the better part of my vaycay thus far.

Anyway, in the above metaphor (if we’re generous enough to call it that) oil companies and Republicans are doing the scratching and the Democrats, as always, are exposing their bellies, wagging faintly.

House Dems capitulated on the off-shore drilling ban yesterday - ending a 25-year moratorium on drilling in US coastal waters.

Faced with a promised veto from Bush on their 50-mile plan, Democrats said, “Oh well then, I guess we give up.”

How many seats in Congress must we win before we start using the power we have? Would a 430-5 majority do it? Or would the Dems still find themselves quivering in terror before the Republican “we’ll-say-something-mean/untrue-about-you” machine?

I get it - Republicans are better at spin, and would leave the Dems holding the bag for $4 gasoline in an election year.

But what is the point of power if you’re not going to use it?

I’m not talking about corruption; I’m talking about the people electing you to office for a reason. In 2006, American voters looked around and thought, ‘Well, that is some bullshit.” And then we turn around and give them the same old bullshit. Now with false promises of lowered gas prices!

Seriously, I’ve been watching way too much of The Wire. I’ve got harmonica riffs stuck in my head, and I’m feeling just overly sassy about damn near everything.

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Look, I’m not the fittest cat on the planet. I do things like reading for a living and abhor things like running. It’s clear to me that I’m not most likely Olympian.

In addition, there are some sports that just look really difficult. Like hurdles. Or shotput. It looks hard as hell to throw a shotput. [Or is shotput the name of the sport and the ball is called something else?]

But while I’ve accepted the fact that I will never be a shotputress, I’m pretty convinced that I could play water polo at an Olympic level.

Granted, tonight is the first time that I’ve ever seen water polo on teevee, but it looks mostly like short bursts of swimming (check), treading water (check) and close-range throwing (checkish).

[Also, why isn't it called 'water soccer' (or 'football'), since it closely resembles soccer and completely lacks any sticks.]  [To that end, why isn't polo called 'horse hockey'? There's a sport I could get behind.]

Actually, the only thing keeping me from a water polo career is the thought of being wet again today (or ever again). I know we’re all supposed to be happy about the precipition given the status of the dams, but cold, driving rain is my least favorite weather ever. I felt (and looked) as though I’d been drowned when I got to school today.

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Man, I should have forseen that watching the Olympics would be better with Aussie commentators.

This is, of course, a country where the commentator at the family-focused Birdman Rally was only (gently) told off after about the tenth ‘fuck’ in a row. Many a ‘pissed’, ’shit’ and ‘damn’ went past entirely unnoticed.

The commentary hasn’t been quite that colorful, but the gymnastics pointless chatter is way better than the States. Notably, there is no (what I swear I remember as being) Bryan Adams. Who is the pop singer who does women’s gymnastics commentary?

Anyway, he’s not there. And there’s a reasonably cantankerous woman on the Aussie commentating team. She appears to be named Liz (this are paraphrases):

Liz: Well, that’s a 0.1 to 0.3 deduction for that on beam. Depending on how harsh the judges are.

Guy: Well, Liz, I bet you’d be taking the 0.3

Liz: Well, I’d be right.

Commentary later tonight included:

That is not was the Ukranian team needed right now.

And:

And she’s had an absolute horror of a showing thus far. Let’s see if she can do… and she’s stepped out of bounds.

It’s been pretty amazing. I just hope the Aussies make it into the top eight so I actually get to see (hear) more of Liz. She is awesome.

Speaking of gymnastics awesome, this (I think) is a clip of Kerri Strug at the 1996 Olympics. Can I tell you how much I would not vault a second time on a busted ankle? I am weak-willed and do not have the spirit of an Olympian:

I think it’s the right video that’s been taken down off this Gawker post. But who can be sure, since my bandwidth has been throttled for the rest of the month? Thanks Australia. (We’re going to kill you in the gymnastics, too…)

Like Richard, I love the Olympics - human rights abuses and all. And I like indoor sports, so no smog.

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